Number of Americans Moving to Canada Reaches 30 Year High
Urban News Service — Land of Affordable Health Care
There is a mass northern migration afoot, as fed up Americans in record numbers are seeking political asylum with our Canadian brothers, sisters and e-spouses. Not since the height of the Vietnam War has Canada experienced such a large influx of eager new citizens.
One such expatriate, former Cleveland school teacher Sally Harris, 36, described her motivations for moving on the CBC thusly: “I love my country and the freedoms we once held, probably more than our current leaders do. But for the sake of my family, another 18 months of the Bush regime is too heavy a burden to pay. I can no longer, in good conscience, allow my tax dollars to aid and abet needless global misery.”
Already, conservative anti-immigration politicians in the states are calling for Canada to erect draconian fences along their borders to keep more Americans out. Leading the charge to stop this exodus is Colorado Republican Tom Tancredo. He has enlisted The Minutemen, minus D. Boon, sit in comfortable lawn chairs and drink beer along our northern border.
Though Tancredo, a self professed defender of preserving “American culture”, has fought to deny millions of Mexicans a pathway to U.S. citizenship, he expresses mixed feelings about seeing so many upwardly mobile middle class Americans exit stage north. As Tancredo explained yesterday on Fox Noise:
“Under normal circumstances, I am a love it or leave it kind of guy. If these whimpy limp wrist liberals want to cut and run on our President during a time of war, I’d show them the door. But if all of them leave, then all of us ‘normal Americans’ will be need to learn Spanish in a hurry.”
When questioned about this startling trend, Whitehouse press secretary and “normal American” Tony Snow refuted the numbers. “What is really going on is quite remarkable. Americans in droves are becoming proactive ambassadors of President Bush’s pro Democracy message.”
Snow would later go on fulfill his contractual obligations to shamelessly exploiting September 11th in the same press briefing. “In this post 9/11 world, true patriots are doing more than just watching Fox News, boycotting France and funding Fred Thompson’s White House run, they are spanning out across the globe to topple regimes hostile to our national interests, such as the Universal health care jihadist movement in Quebec.”
When called on his obvious bullshit by Helen Thomas, Snow declined to speculate as to why hordes of loyal patriotic Americans would flee the land of their birth, the richest nation of earth, for more frozen socialized pastures. “Beats me”, said Snow as he quickly changed topics to claim the surge in Iraq was beginning to pay dividends.
Oh Tony, let me count the ways …
I often look longingly at the lights of Vancouver on the northern horizon from our island, wondering if it is time to cut and run.
We were married up by Victoria and always look at the free real estate magazines every time we go back. One day maybe — a look time from now.
the house at the end of the street is still for rent. It’s all old-lady decorated, but I can help you out with it. just remember the Bagels….. we’ll sponsor you!
I read that article (the one about the Americans moving to Canada) with a snicker, because it’s something I’ve wanted to do ever since I first saw Vancouver.
The sad thing, I don’t think I would qualify for residency over there. Maybe I should just make a run for it…
I kid, I kid.
How many times can I tell you that your posts are brilliant?
as always, this is a hoot! I love the call for true patriots to do more than watch Fox news… as for myself, I’ll have to go find a Canadian e-spouse, just in case I need a place of refugee.
Ah, the photo of O’Reilly and Coulter makes me ill. Very hilarious (but sad) piece! And you may be amused to know I was at La Poste in Paris yesterday, shipping five packages to the US. But the clerk couldn’t find any link to the US in his computer. In exasperation, he called another clerk over, who also looked in vain. During this period they were joking that maybe George Bush has succeeded in blocking mail from France to the US. Finally they discovered the reference to the US has been changed from “Les Etats Unis” to “Les Etats Unis de Amerique.” We all breathed a collective sigh of relief that it hasn’t come to that (yet).
Chortle, chortle… somehow your brilliance always comes through with a good dose of the “knowing grins”…
Bravo, Herb… bravo…
How many really see the change in our freedoms? The path we are set upon and the inevitable road…. Loved this. Wish I had such a way with satire.
There is only three things that prevent me from moving to Canada. One, the weather, two, Canadians live there. and three, the weather.
I think I meant “there ARE only three things”. Obviously my libral edumacation dint provide me with any gramma skilz.
I have liked every Canadian I’ve ever met. Admittedly, that is a pretty small sample size. As for the weather, I’d stick to the coasts. The weather in BC is similar to Seattle, where I lived for for over a decade. Montreal is probably not much unlike Philly, where I grew up. But you probably couldn’t pay me to live in fly over country. Calgary gets way too much snow and I hate shoveling.
You know I often hear people threaten this in conversation, but this is the first time I am reading something like this.
Herb you need to lauch your own magazine or write a book.
Take care,
Frances
Oh, this would be an easy decision to make for me and mine, but we’d better make it quick so we can use Bush as our reason.
And just think — there is something about that magic line between the USA and Canada, where Canadians, on the average, live one year longer than Americans. (I thought that the biggest migration north occurred during the Viet Nam war!)
I don’t think it is that Canadians live longer. It is more like the case with married men’s longevity. It just seems longer.
What am I supposed to say here?